When Your Child Starts Asking, “Why Me?”—What to Say and How to Support Them

Children with chronic health conditions sometimes ask heartbreaking questions like: “Why me?” When your child wonders why they’re the one managing asthma, eczema, food allergies, or another condition, you may feel unsure of what to say. Here are some tips on how to support them with honesty, empathy, and hope.

1. Acknowledge Their Feelings

Validate their emotions first. Try saying:

• “It must feel really hard.”
• “It’s okay to feel sad or frustrated.”

2. Give Honest, Age-Appropriate Explanations

• Younger kids: “Everyone’s body is different. Yours needs extra help sometimes.”
• Older kids: “Doctors don’t always know why, but we do know how to manage it together.”

3. Empower Them 

Highlight what they can do, not just what they can’t. Share inspiring stories of others with the same condition or help them practice skills that give them independence.

4. Make Space for Ongoing Discussions

This won’t be a one-time conversation. Let your child know they can vent, share their concerns, and ask questions whenever they need.

5. Normalize Their Experience

Reassure your child that they’re not alone. Share that many kids manage asthma, eczema, or allergies too—and that having a condition doesn’t define who they are. 

Final Thoughts

The question “Why me?” doesn’t have one perfect answer—but what matters most is showing your child they are seen, supported, and loved.